Kent and I were talking about what our identity lies in. Meaning if you were in a room and someone said “share a little about yourself” what would you say? I admittedly always blurt out that I am a mother of two toddlers, and Kent always starts with he’s a doctor. We ruminated on why we do that, because in fact we both have a lot of other qualities, hobbies, and interests that also define us but for one reason or another that’s not the first thing that comes to mind.
Now this probably isn’t an epiphany for most but what we came up with is that what defines us is where most of our time is dedicated. I am a mommy and toddler wrangler 24/7 and Kent is Dr. Kent most of the time. Because we dedicate most of our time here this is what drives our thoughts, our interactions, and our relationships.
Is this bad that our identity lies in these things? Quite honestly what should be influencing my thoughts, my interactions, and my relationships should be first and foremost God. The focus on God will then be reflected in what I do in my daily activities. If I made all my decisions based on a heart only focused on my kids, I would make a lot of crazy mistakes like perhaps spoiling my kids, thinking it was in their best interest to make them materialistically satisfied or “happy” all the time (good luck with that!) They would turn out… well like a lot of people in my generation who are now making a lot of big mistakes and having a tough life for it. And if Kent made all his decisions with a heart only focused on his career he would neglect his family and friends and neglect using his practice as a ministry.
2 Timothy 3:16 16 All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, 17 that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.
The focus on Christ helps me be a wise mother and meditation on God’s word guides me to discipline my children correctly. The focus on Christ helps Kent balance his relationships and tells him how to love his wife, children, friends, and business partners, and clients. God is the only solid foundation and identity that we can build up from. Remember the kids’ song? The wise man built his house on the ROCK?
Matthew 7:24 Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock.
I’m sure you’re like “Duh, Brooke I learned that at VBS in 2nd grade.” But you know so did I. And it took a long conversation with Kent today to realize that my heart has not been anchored on the right things. If I’m not reading Gods scripture how can I train in righteousness? How can I be equipped for every good work? Lately I’ve been frantic worrying about how to raise my kids the right way that I have been focusing all my time on them. It’s like cramming for a test the night before- all this frustrating; rushing around like an idiot and nothing helpful gets accomplished without a solid foundation. Now I know we all go through ebbs and flows of “being good” at reading our bible and praying and focusing on God. And I am certainly not condemning anyone for “being bad” at that cause I am by far the worst offender here and in being such am grateful to share the message of Jesus Christ, who paid for all our sins. I just had my attention drawn to the fact that majority of my time is not spent meditating on scripture and God and what I don’t fill with God will get filled with something else, and that will be what pours out from me. I realized I would much rather have God’s reflection pour out from me than whatever second rate messy concoction I try to drum up. His words are eternal, consistent, true, and living and I pray they flow out from my soul and flood into every part of my life.
Deuteronomy 11:18-22 You shall therefore lay up these words of mine in your heart and in your soul, and you shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. 19 You shall teach them to your children, talking of them when you are sitting in your house, and when you are walking by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. 20 You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates, 21 that your days and the days of your children may be multiplied in the land that the Lord swore to your fathers to give them, as long as the heavens are above the earth.
I don’t really know if this is helpful to anyone else but writing it has been very helpful to me. Kind of a recalibration if you will.
Prayers for wisdom and guidance from Alabama